Stormy weather
Gwendolyn: "Don't talk to me about the weather, Mr Worthing. When people talk to me about the weather, I'm quite certain they mean something else... And that makes me so nervous."
Say! She's Gwen too!
Anyway, she's quite wrong in this case, I'm really talking about the weather...
It's summer now... So it's really HOT! Got under the weather a bit... With some headaches and stuff... But I don't feel too bad being in
For a while though, we were getting quite a nice relief from the heat... There was a short season of rain... Hmm... Rain is putting it nicely... We were getting some pretty exciting thunderstorms...
Back home, we lived in the water catchment area... (Read: Rain 24/7) And I loved watching the storms from my room window or inside the car... (the safe places)... listening to the sound of the rain hitting my window... Lightning is especially facinating to watch... The funny patterns that come up against the backdrop of the darkened sky... Just beautiful... Some would be so near that it would light up the entire house! Of cos, there were the days when I would be caught outside with no umbrella... And I'd walk up the steep slope to get home... Sometimes I'd sing and dance and drink in the surroundings... Other times, I just sloshed my way back, savouring a bad mood... But I'd always arrive at my doorstep, completely soaked to the bone...
It was nice to experience thunderstorms again...
Over here, the winds get really strong and tosses everything around... Like the dustbin on the roof of Pathshala... Feels as though it could almost lift me up and blow me away... Sometimes the sand gets swept up on the road and we gotta cover our faces... It's very terrible for rickshaw wallahs... If they have passengers, they can't stop and find shelter... they have to continue riding while closing their eyes... Good thing they don't get into any accidents... Or at least not as far as I've heard...
When the rain comes, the whole place just changes... Traffic reduces to a trickle... Everything slows down... For me, I leave the door open and let the smell of the rain and the cool breeze get into the room... Sometimes, I just stop what I'm doing and just stare at the rain... Rain always gives me that lovely lazy feeling...
posted by thebemusedphotog @ 11:47 AM
4 Comments:
What did you do on May day?
Actually, I don't know. But I'm sure you do. Why don't you tell me, Rick?
To the sister in pain: A HUGE, LONG, WARM hug. I am so sorry you are hurt and in pain over this good-for-nothing guy. I think a person who is in a relationship with someone but spends long hours/nights with her/his friends from the opposite gender is absolutely disrespectful of her/his partner (significant other) and their relationship. And, if he is lying or hiding things, then he does not deserve you. In other words, by chosing to spend time, especially late night hours, with his women friends, he is not only disrespecting you, this shows his total disregard for the bond, feelings, spirituality and relationship you both share for each other. It especially shows a disregard for your feelings. It is a violation, impiety, and degradation to your existence as a spiritual human being--it is dehumanizing. And, one who treats you this way, does not deserve you. I feel for you. You should leave him. I, personally stretch this a little further to include the early stages of venturing feelings for each other (before a commitment has been made) and consider spending too much time with the opposite gender 'buddies' as a sign of disrespect to the feelings of the significant other. But, have you given it a thought that his time with other women, like Gwen, must have been very insignificant to him, that's why he didn't bother taking the time to tell you about their outings? Or, it must have been very significant and precious, so he hid it from you, didn't want to share it, when you asked about happenings? In this case, it was wrong of him to do so.
Jealousy is a word and a feeling concocted by patriarchy to denigrate a feeling. By creating negative meanings around it, patriarchy and men in the society devalue women as a human being who feels that way. And, women feel this way because of men. Patriarchy creates and places womyen in situation where they feel this way; it's men's insolent, careless, insensitive behaviours toward women that generate these feelings. When these feelings generate in women, they are labeled neurotic, psychotic, etc. If men behaved and were sensitive enough to issues of women, then womyen wouldn't feel jealous. Jealousy is not about women's insecurities (something patriarchy would like to have us believe), it's about a man's total disregard of and insensitivity to her existence and feelings. Just see how insensitive this man was to you, he just said he wrote those yesterday to make you angry. Such disrespect and so insensitive.
However, what is worse, when your significant other makes you feel stupid or unintelligent because they think you won't figure out what's going on, or you won't find out that he has been with other women or spends hours with them.
Can you imagine if your significant other was a feminist and he was doing the same, questioning and devaluing your intelligence as if you are stupid and won't know? He would hide things thinking you won't find out if he didn't tell you. Such an antithesis of what a feminist is about. Instead of valuing you as an equal, he treats you as stupid. Imagine if your significant other was a religious man and he treated you this way (i.e. stupid), when women in the religion is regarded very valuable and intelligent. Do you really want to be with someone who treats you this way? Who thinks women are stupid and can't figure things out on their own? I say kick him out.
These behaviours are really not uncommon in our culture/society. Housewives who stay hungry and awake very late at night for their husbands are also dehumanized by this type of behaviours, when the husbands are out late fooling around with women. So, the current behaviours of your significant other are perhaps indications of things to come-- so bewarned.
Further, I want to tell you that since your significant other is spending too much time with other women, then it shows that he really didn't make a commitment to you in his own heart. Before two people make a commitment to/with each other, there has to be first a commitment to oneself like, 'Yes, this is the woman, or man, I am going to pursue, give attention to, respect, love, cherish, etc.' The actions of your significant other demonstrate otherwise.
I also want to tell you that our desh/culture, a conservative landscape, is going through a sexual revolution, meaning youth are making the point that they can be 'just' friends with the opposite gender without any sexual pressures and problems. So, we see youth, both women and men, who are unrelated or not in a relationship interact with each other more physically than we have seen in the past. They want to be 'progressive' and 'modern'. Frankly, I see this as imitating the West (and lacking creativity on the parts of the youth culture), and disregarding one's own 'tradition,' culture, religion, etc. But, know that sometimes people can be 'just' friends.
This guy is not only disrespectful of/toyou, he is also ridiculing you publicly when he says, 'waiting for you passionately.' He really does not care for you or esle he would not be siding with his woman friend over you. In other words, he really does not care if he lost you and hurt you. You should recognize his utter insensitivity towards you and your feelings and move on. You should leave him and you'll see you will find your happiness and peace.
Please please, sister, find the strength to stand tall and I pray that you can soon overcome this.
But, sister, I also have to ask you to not bring these issues to other people's blog. I understand you might not have had found other outlets to address these issues to your significant other, but, please have respect for others too.
If you want to talk, email me at anti.feminist.feminist@gmail.com
I hope you can find the beautiful sweet flower that resides within your heart, as it resides in all us womyen.
"There are Non-Bengali Westerners who speak Bengali (Bangla) much better than any Bengalee ever could."... This msg is actually for the antifeminist feminist (sorry gwen!): with regard to the comment you made (in quotes above) - i'd like to speak to ONE. so please contact via this tag board. btw, have you read conrad's heart of darkness by any chance? kurtz thought he had it all figured out too... :D an
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