Turning 22
It’s a strange thing… Having a birthday when you’re so far away from home… It feels different…
I got my first birthday sms at 10pm Dhaka time from my “mama”… (it was midnight at Singapore...) It came in while I was having cha with Mumit… One of the Pathshala guys… Yeah… It was really sweet… Thing is… Mumit’s birthday is the 6th… So, interestingly, we have the same birthday for about 2 hours!
So far, 22 hasn’t been too bad… I visited Mumit’s home just now… Cos he was going home and asked me if I wanted to come along… (They are all very hospitable) I got to have a bit of his birthday dinner! And I couldn’t help watching the telly… It was a hindi movie with Sharuk Khan… Good grief… He’s almost 40 but he was playing the cool/popular/good-looking teenager who gets the pretty girl… I hate to sound bimbo… But I actually found it quite fun to watch… The whole show is very colourful… And they always have the usual musical style thingy…
Before it was even close to my birthday, Bjorn gave me a pre-birthday celebration… We ran across the road to the baker… Bought two slices of cake… And ran back to Pathshala to eat them… No candles… No fuss… Just unbearably sweet cake… He even sang me a birthday song… “Happy Birthday to you Tomorrow”… That’s just like him…
He’s been really sweet to me since we got to know each other… Always the one to laugh with, and share every little silly confidence with… A very good natured and jovial person… Never takes offence at anything… He isn’t hiding anything either… He’s just honest… He plays the guitar too… When he found my guitar, he started playing it… And we even discovered songs that we both know and were singing at the top of our voices… Haha!
In honour of the Nightbird tradition, I went out at night… Just to look at how the streets were… I wasn’t alone… Topu came along… (They all have this impression that girls shouldn’t go anywhere alone… That’s how I ended up going to Mumit’s house too…) I was relating to him stories of the Night bird activities… And he looked at me and said… You miss home right?
Yeah… Maybe more than I have in a couple of weeks…
Things had not been going too well for me… I messed up my photo shoot that morning… I messed up the proposal for my reportage… I was messed up… Just this afternoon, I cried… because I’d felt so useless and so pathetic… I actually tried to stop myself from crying and force myself to concentrate on making the proposal right… Even smsed a neutral source to get a whacking (i.e. get the person to think clearly and rationalize with me that I’m wallowing in self-pity)…
I got my first birthday sms at 10pm Dhaka time from my “mama”… (it was midnight at Singapore...) It came in while I was having cha with Mumit… One of the Pathshala guys… Yeah… It was really sweet… Thing is… Mumit’s birthday is the 6th… So, interestingly, we have the same birthday for about 2 hours!
So far, 22 hasn’t been too bad… I visited Mumit’s home just now… Cos he was going home and asked me if I wanted to come along… (They are all very hospitable) I got to have a bit of his birthday dinner! And I couldn’t help watching the telly… It was a hindi movie with Sharuk Khan… Good grief… He’s almost 40 but he was playing the cool/popular/good-looking teenager who gets the pretty girl… I hate to sound bimbo… But I actually found it quite fun to watch… The whole show is very colourful… And they always have the usual musical style thingy…
Before it was even close to my birthday, Bjorn gave me a pre-birthday celebration… We ran across the road to the baker… Bought two slices of cake… And ran back to Pathshala to eat them… No candles… No fuss… Just unbearably sweet cake… He even sang me a birthday song… “Happy Birthday to you Tomorrow”… That’s just like him…
He’s been really sweet to me since we got to know each other… Always the one to laugh with, and share every little silly confidence with… A very good natured and jovial person… Never takes offence at anything… He isn’t hiding anything either… He’s just honest… He plays the guitar too… When he found my guitar, he started playing it… And we even discovered songs that we both know and were singing at the top of our voices… Haha!
In honour of the Nightbird tradition, I went out at night… Just to look at how the streets were… I wasn’t alone… Topu came along… (They all have this impression that girls shouldn’t go anywhere alone… That’s how I ended up going to Mumit’s house too…) I was relating to him stories of the Night bird activities… And he looked at me and said… You miss home right?
Yeah… Maybe more than I have in a couple of weeks…
Things had not been going too well for me… I messed up my photo shoot that morning… I messed up the proposal for my reportage… I was messed up… Just this afternoon, I cried… because I’d felt so useless and so pathetic… I actually tried to stop myself from crying and force myself to concentrate on making the proposal right… Even smsed a neutral source to get a whacking (i.e. get the person to think clearly and rationalize with me that I’m wallowing in self-pity)…
The neutral source, although a kind of researcher, destroyed all stereotype that Engine students are thinkers... He was partial to crying and letting things out… I got that, and the floodgates opened… I should have called my “mama”…
It did some good though… The crying… Really felt a bit better… (And by God’s grace, the report is back on track…)
Listening to “Fly Away” now… A while back, the Nightbirds were always listening to Corrinne May’s album… Ivan and I really liked it and we wanted to educate Mark on the finer points of her music… It didn’t work… He doesn’t recognize her song titles, can’t recall any of the lyrics and still can’t tell if a song is sung by Corrinne May or otherwise…
There’s a certain quiet at night that just can’t be found at any other time… I’d learnt to feel it, breathe it, live in it and thrive in it… It clears my head, makes me sane… And it was a comfort… As it is right now… (Sounds like it could be a worship song to Jesus eh?)
If I was back home, what would I be doing?
Probably sleeping by now… But not before cutting my birthday cake at the stroke of midnight… Would have seen and used my new D70 a zillion times already… Would have had a lovely birthday cake (my choice), a birthday song, birthday card, surprise birthday gifts and birthday hugs and kisses… The way I celebrated my birthday for the past 21 years…
But I’m not home…
That’s why I just walked across the road to have chaffee (cha & coffee) with Mumit and Topu… Got punches(not hard) by the guys at the stroke of midnight… Joined Ovick in analyzing Jess’ pictures… (They’re still at it)… Tomorrow… Or rather, later today… I will be buying a birthday cake to share with all the Pathshala students on the rooftop… And I will be meeting my multimedia buddies for dinner when I can…
So my 22nd birthday is a little different from the past… But it seems like a turning point… From when I was a small island kid… To when I became an independent adult… Fending for herself at every turn… Not being too afraid to try anything… Most things anyway…
I once told Topu that I’m not afraid of anything… He was trying to intimidate me... (At least for cockroaches… Diya thinks I’m the bravest girl in the world because I whacked a cockroach at close range… She uses aerosol) Maybe I’m exaggerating with the whole "I'm not afraid of anything"… But then, I’m beginning to see it… A strength and courage I never knew I had before… Until I started to live here...
It did some good though… The crying… Really felt a bit better… (And by God’s grace, the report is back on track…)
Listening to “Fly Away” now… A while back, the Nightbirds were always listening to Corrinne May’s album… Ivan and I really liked it and we wanted to educate Mark on the finer points of her music… It didn’t work… He doesn’t recognize her song titles, can’t recall any of the lyrics and still can’t tell if a song is sung by Corrinne May or otherwise…
There’s a certain quiet at night that just can’t be found at any other time… I’d learnt to feel it, breathe it, live in it and thrive in it… It clears my head, makes me sane… And it was a comfort… As it is right now… (Sounds like it could be a worship song to Jesus eh?)
If I was back home, what would I be doing?
Probably sleeping by now… But not before cutting my birthday cake at the stroke of midnight… Would have seen and used my new D70 a zillion times already… Would have had a lovely birthday cake (my choice), a birthday song, birthday card, surprise birthday gifts and birthday hugs and kisses… The way I celebrated my birthday for the past 21 years…
But I’m not home…
That’s why I just walked across the road to have chaffee (cha & coffee) with Mumit and Topu… Got punches(not hard) by the guys at the stroke of midnight… Joined Ovick in analyzing Jess’ pictures… (They’re still at it)… Tomorrow… Or rather, later today… I will be buying a birthday cake to share with all the Pathshala students on the rooftop… And I will be meeting my multimedia buddies for dinner when I can…
So my 22nd birthday is a little different from the past… But it seems like a turning point… From when I was a small island kid… To when I became an independent adult… Fending for herself at every turn… Not being too afraid to try anything… Most things anyway…
I once told Topu that I’m not afraid of anything… He was trying to intimidate me... (At least for cockroaches… Diya thinks I’m the bravest girl in the world because I whacked a cockroach at close range… She uses aerosol) Maybe I’m exaggerating with the whole "I'm not afraid of anything"… But then, I’m beginning to see it… A strength and courage I never knew I had before… Until I started to live here...
I think that perhaps in future, I would want to come back here again... To work, to live, and to learn something I can't learn in Singapore like photography and Bangla... Think this is going to upset my mum so I shall stop here now...
Think I’m getting too sentimental… Going to the rooftop to get some air…
posted by thebemusedphotog @ 1:00 AM
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